Project Work
What’s Jack up to? He’s back to being snappy. I don’t know what’s gotten into Jack lately with this. I think the Dear Twins have been playing with him too much and he thinks this snapping thing is cool. Well it must stop. I’ve got enough people growling and snapping at me. I don’t need demands from Mister Jack.
Project Runway starts and the designers are just as baffled over Keith’s win as I was. Then Heidi and the sweet Chris March comes out in full drag and looking fab announcing they have to design a look for a drag queen.
Fun. Fun. Fun.In comes Tim say the look will be auctioned off to Broadway cares and the winner will have immunity. Yay something to fight for and fight they will.
First Joe says he’s out of his element then later he dances with a bra on. Hmm…Blayne says if he was a drag queen his name would be Neon-licious and he actually gives me my first laugh of the night. I hate the licious but I guess I was missing it. Then Leanne said Barf-licious and I really cracked up. Nice.
Back in the work room it’s a Cirque gone wrong and we get background on Jerell and Suede which makes me worried for each of them. Keith is doing fringe. Why is he always going all these pieacy swatch things? I’m so over Keith.
The Drag queens come back in as their normal every day selves and they are unrecognizable.
It’s try on time.
Jerell’s Queen is not in love.
Hedda Lettuce is not happy and called Suede lazy. Bam. I told you I was worried for both of them. Suede said that she’s going to be soggy Lettuce.On the walkthrough with Chris, Tim called Blayne’s outfit “A terradactyl out of the gay Jurassic Park.” Not good if you ask me but Blayne thought it was in his little warped mind. Whatever gets you through the day.
Chris and Tim thought Joe was fantastic. What?
Suede they liked and then they told him to have it out with Hedda Lettuce. Ha they just want to see Suede get his butt kicked by a drag queen.
Keith got different. Never good.
Daniel was plain but he’s not worried. Okay dude.Runway day and if you ask me the queens look a little dragged through the mud. Please to make up.Hedda lettuce and Suede have words and Hedda Lettuce is sweet as pie. Aww. Such a Lady.Stella gives me my 3rd full out laugh of the night laugh when she says “Jerell’s outfit is classy how ev-ah these broads aren’t classy.” This from Lea-tha Stella! I love it. But she does look nice for the Runway show tonight. And hey RuPaul is the guest judge. You’d Better Work!
Now for the runway show.Kenley-Like
Blayne-No
Joe-yes-model loved her outfit.
Stella-yes. Why is one of her best for a drag queen?
Suede-no
Daniel-ok-but not enough. Just a dress.
Terri yes- My fave. She stepped up the game
Jerell-yes but ok.
Korto-Just ok.
Keith-messy-Hey, Heidi said the same thing.
Leanne-old age spacey? No.
And the winner is Terri, What! Joe. I cannot believe that Terri missed out again. This is getting on my nerves.Now it’s down to Daniel and Keith out this week is… Daniel. Great. Not. I can look forward to more fringe next week.
On Shear Genius Nicole won the short cut challenge and Daniel is okay with that. Right.The big challange is to create a hair style to reflect a season for a photo shoot. Rene say’s “Go Shake It.” The season is almost over and I still don’t know what that means. Does anybody?Sidebar: I just saw the commercial about voting for fan favorite. I kind of want to start a gras
s roots campaign for Oshun. The Stylist that never was. I still think he would have made that show for me. Let’s all go on line and vote Oshun. Wouldn’t it be funny if he won ten grand? Then a bombshells is dropped the guest judge is Linda Wells the editor of Allure.
The photographer, whose name I totally missed, was a nightmare. Making Daniel drop flowers and pull down hair to a wet mess.
The winner of the challenge was Charlie and I agree with that.
Out this week is Daniel. Taken out by a sad red braid.
photos thanks to Bravo
Best,
Kwana
It’s a Jungle out there.
What’s Jack up to? As I write this he’s under my bed asleep. A few peaceful Jack moments. So sweet. How long do you think it will last?
Project Runway starts with the designers working it out and Blayne still talking “liscious”. Why is he still around?
The challenge is to design for a high powered and glamorous woman. It turns out to be Brooke Shields and they have to design an outfit for her Lipstick Jungle character Wendy. Fun. You all know how I loved that show last year.
Then the other shoe dropps and Tim tells the designers they would be working in teams of two. Bummer.Scramble time. Jerell actually said he’d better pay attention and give the client what she wanted after the last challenge. Good thinking Jerell
Now the designers pitch to Brooke and the winner will be worn on the showThe winners are Keith, Korto, Jerell, Kelli, Terri and Blayne and now they go off into teams.
The teams are: Terri and 3rd person Suede, Blayne and Leanne, Keith and Kenley, Korto and Joe, Kellie and Daniel, Jerell and Stella.The designers are at Mood to buy fabrics and already the team dynamic is not gellin’.
Back at Parsons Tim comes in like is immaculate Grin Reaper with more bad news saying how winning is good enough and there will be no immunity with this challenge. “Gee thanks Tim. Anything you want to tell us about Santa Clause or the Easter Bunny?”Grim Tim pops up again sending in the models for an early fitting. Um, doesn’t look like they have much to fit yet Tim. Way to make everyone happy today.
Terri and Suede are not having a good time and Terri’s curls are curling up even more. I’m afraid he may get the smackdown.
Tim doing a walk through: He likes Jerell and Stella, Kellie and Daniel have him stumped, He made Terri feel better so Suede is living for another minute. Not so grim now Tim. He is not in love with the proportions of Korto’s jacket and Joe chimes in that he was thinking it all along. Korto was like, “what, now you tell me? “ Joe is getting the smackdown.It’s the day of the runway show and I can’t tell about these outfits. They all look a hot mess to me. There are way too many patterns and colors for one outfit. Chiffon, leopard, floral, oh my!
But, I’m just loving Jerell and his stinky face critiques. I’m with him. I’ll have to see them on the Runway to tell.
Korto:like
Kellie: No
Jarell:Like
Keith:no
Terri:No
Blayne:ok but ultra casual.
Terri and Korto got to stay they were the middle of the road ok. I was surprised by that because I was not loving Terri’s outfit but ok for her. I think Korto was a stronger outfit and should have been in the tops with Jerell.
The Judges like Jerell and Stella
They do not like Kelli and Daniel and Michael Kors said. “Slutty, slutty, slutty.”The judges like Keith’s look but it didn’t thrill me. I’m not for all those layers. He does love that doesn’t he and that to fabric was just blah to me.
Blayne/ Leanne the judges thought he was too casual too.
The winner is Keith! I’m kinda shocked, but I shouldn’t be. What do I know? UGH!
Out this week is… Kelli. Rightly so. Who coule wear that to work? But, next week Drag queens!
Shear Genius did have a really cute kid challenge today and Daniel won the short cut with a cute little girl that wanted to look like Jaclyn. Way to win over the judges.
Then for the main challenge and the stylists family members come out and for the twist they have to not style their own family members hair but another stylist family members hair eek!
Daniel had the nerve to put his mother with Charlie. Very bold.
The winner was Charlie for doing right by Daniel’s mom’s hair and the loser was Paolo for his choppy palm tree look. Buh Bye.
Best,Kwana
Project Olympiad
What’s Jack up to? He’s starting to get back to himself and it back to bringing me his toys to play with at the most annoying times. Yay! Are you loving me again, Jack?
We interrupt this week’s RWA conference posts to talk Project Runway. It feels like home on a Wednesday night with Project runway. Yay. I’m a happy girl!
The show starts and Korto in not crying over anyone going home and Kenley is thrilled about immunity.
Sidebar: I have to say after seeing last week’s show I Terri should have won. Kenly’s dress was out there and different I wasn’t into the asymmetry of it.
I thought Terri rocked it and should have won. The challenge was all about NY inspiration and her model screamed NY cool.
Now for this week’s field trip and Suede is loving it with his 3rd person craziness and Blayne is going though tan withdrawal which is getting kind of scary. They head to the Armory Track and Field center and are greeted by a skating Apolo Ohno who I half expect to break out in a dance. They are given an Olympic challenge and have to design a women’s wear outfit for the opening ceremony.Stella is talking gladiator and leather and fur. Uh oh! Jarell is all about the hats and classics. Daniel is just confused.
Back in the city and Keith is a big fabric thief at Mood and Terri may have to smack him. Joe is doing a skort and want to win it for his girls and Blayne is moaning about is lack of tan and losing his ability to think or design or whatever he does. Apparently the tan is his special energy. Who knew?Stella is doing her whole outfit in black for I guess the Olympic biker chick?
Keith let it out that he was a competitive gymnast as a young boy and the way he said it was somehow sad and so telling. Was there hazing?
Korto Goes into her past in Liberia and how America is the land of second chances and breaks all our hearts for a moment making the tanorexic seem so shallow.
Tim starts his walk through. Tim likes Joe. Blayne showed his pure idiocy by not knowing Sergeant Pepper. Can a boy get a reference and stop watching the WB and MTV? Please.
Daniel is unraveling. Jarell is doing Lucy Ricardo according to Tim not good.
For, Jennifer Tim said the word ‘matronly’. Eek!Late at night Joe and Daniel got into a machine fight. Then Joe wants to get all mean about the amount of “queens” there. His word not mine. He’d better watch out. This is Project Runway and he still has to walk the streets and get a job in New York when it all over. Be smart Joe.
Day of the runway show and I have a feeling it is going to be a dozy. I can’t wait to see these babies go down the runway. Korto was right it is a whole history lesson about to walk down the runway. Heidi comes out wearing something short, black and tight. Yeah, I’m slow but picking up on the trend too.Here are my thoughts as they came down the runway:
Korto-likie very much
Suede-like but not practical
Kellie-question mark for me
Joe-like very USA slightly too literal?
Leanne-like
Daniel- What? Purple? Party? Huh?
Jerell Crazy, Lucy is right. Cutness though in its own nutty way. Not Olympics at all.
Stella-No way Olympics. sleek biker chick.
Keith-No way.
Terri- Oh Yes!
Jennifer- A No-Boring cocktail outfit
Blayne-Blade Runner redux
Kenley-Cute dress but not OlympicsIt seems the judges agree with me in most cases. Poor Daniel who has turned temporally colorblind is teary. Now can we talk for a moment about Jerell’s hat? Not the hat he made for his model but the crazy hat he was wearing? What was with that? Too funny.
My top three Terri, Korto, Joe
Bottom three: Daniel, Jerell and Jennifer. Me and the judges are totally in sync tonight. Great line of the night came from Michael Kors about Daniel’s dress. “If your sport is drinking it’s a good dress.”
The winner is… Korto!
And out this week is… Jennifer. Buh- Buy Jennifer. Tea outfits don’t work for the Olympics.
As for Shear Genus, No big post for me. Just know that show is crazy. Why are they putting molasses and squid and peanut butter in people’s hair and making them look ridiculous. Once again remind me NEVER to go on that show. You know I do crazy crap like that. Now they are making the stylists cut dog’s hair to match their owners. What? Now you know I love Jack but I so am so not taking him into my stylist for a haircut. She would smack me quick and send me packing and rightly so. Pla-ease!
In the end the winner was Dee and she did a great job with what she had to work with and the loser was Nekisa who had to go home some day. Why not today?Best,
KwanaStay tuned for more party pics from Nationals Scroll down for Nora Roberts encounters!
Project Makeover
What’s Jack up to? It’s Raining bucket’s so he’s perched up high on the couch looking longingly out the window willing the rain to stop. Sorry Jack.Project Runway is underway hooray. Holla at your boy. Not.
Kelli has her immunity so she is free to breathe easy for this challenge. The day starts off with reality setting in for Suede and the other designers. They set off to parsons and the model pick off. Kelli says with her model and Joe stars the switching. Jen snatches Jarell’s model making him salty. I love that word. Salty! Let’s all use it this week.The next challenge is making cocktail dress for their models. Sounds sweet. Maybe a little too sweet of you ask me. They have to use green fabrics. No not green- green environmentally friendly green. But here’s the twist. The models get to shop for the fabric! Ha! Funny.
The poor models are lost in Mood. One was pulling out some gold lame looking stuff and there were some very slinky things that didn’t look green to me but we will see.
Kenley instantly nixes some fabric from her model and Keith hates some of his models fabrics. Wesley is not happy.
At least Jarell is smiling and so is Suede. Once again Stella is complaining. Waa, waa, waa. Going against what her model wants.Suede goes crazy the bias strips and stars talking about himself in 3rd person.
3 designers have the same fabric. How much do I love the models for that? And Korto and Emily and similar dresses and are getting all crazy over it. The competition is fierce
It’s time for Tim’s walk though and Korto confuses him with her inside out stitching. Too green for ya Tim?
Suede excites Tim, but so far scares me. We’ll see.
Leanne has gone circle crazy.
And Tim announces no immunity for this challenge but the winner will have their dress manufactured by Bluefly.com
Runway show day and its panic time except for Leanna who is all confidence. And Blayne pulls out the Lisiousness.
Stella is lucky that her model likes the dress even though she didn’t listen to her.
Daniel is still at the sewing machine with 5 minutes to go.
And crazy Stella tried to steam her dress ON the model. Way to burn your client Stella.Time for the runway show with special guest judge Natalie Portman.
But first sidebar. How much do I love Terri’s wild hair? Did I say that last week?
Now really to the show:I Likeie: Terri, Jerell, Daniel, Suede, Leanne. Emily, Jennifer, Joe, KenleyNo Likie-Keith, Wesley, Kelli, Stella, Blayne, KortoI originally had Korto in the likie group until I really looked at the wings on the side of the hips. Not a good idea.
I predict Kenly as the winner and Wesley as going home.
Let’s see. Winner is Suede. Wow. Ok. I’m shocked. But ok. I think Kenley was robbed. What do you think?
Poor Korto is in but teary as all get out.
And as for out it’s… Wesley. You can’t make it under the harsh runway lights with puckered satin.
Whew. No energy for Shear Genius but I’ll give it a go.
Nicole wakes first and there are some flip flops. She picks first then calls the stylist up for a day at the beach.
The guest judge is Oscar Blandi and the shortcut challenge is transforming a client’s hair after a long day at the beach without washing the client hair. The clients are all hot surfer guys who come shirtless and wet out of the water.
The stylist can use shears, batters powers clippers and a spray bottle.
Daniel and Glenn are talking mess about Nicole still being there making her all Salty.
Glen and Dee have twins so the competition is really thick there.
Once again Nekisa is wack. Big surprise. Not.
Daniel and Glenn bottom two
Tops are Dee and Nicole and the winner is Nicole.
They head back and meet the clients who are dealing with Alopecia a disease which has made then completely bald.
The stylists are moved as they cut and style the perfect wig for their clients.
Nekisa is not winning over Rene and neither is Glenn.
The emotions are going wild and the tears are flowing. Even Charlie can’t make any cracks in this room.
On to the hair show. I have to say, I’m not a fan of all the red wigs.
The top 2 here Nicole and Poulo and the winner is…Poulo. All his emotion with his client paid off. But stinker for him, no immunity in the next challenge. Bummer Dude.
Bottom 3 are Gail, Nekisa and Charlie. Who’s going home? Why it’s… Gail.
Charlie had better step up his game it’s his 2nd time in the bottom 2. The rose has lost its bloom.
Photos thanks to Bravo.
Well I’m off for some preliminary conference beauty prep. What’s up for your day?
Best,
KwanaProject Shear Madness
What’s Jack Up to? Jack’s tired from staying watching Project Runway and Shear Genius. It’s too much great reality for one fab yorkie!Project Runway Season 5 starts with the intro video of the designers and they seem to have it all together. There are some real toughies in this group. They meet Heidi and Tim on the Atlas roof and I know some of them, are ready to push the others off. Watch out for Stella, Suede, Jerell, Jerry and Very Tan Blayne, they all seem ready to push.It’s the crack of dawn and Tim is ringing the doorbells. Eek. It’s off to the first challenge and they are at Gristedes grocery store. And who is there to meet them, but Austin Scarlett in all his glory. Picture this, white pants, blue tapered jacket, white scarf and fedora. Need I say more? Time to make a garment out of grocery items.We have designers buying; mop heads, trash bags, shower curtains and kale greens.
I’m so happy Project Runway is back! Make it Work!
Tan Blayne is big on the “lisous” saying and it’s annoying everyone.Jerry has some fire to him. He looks all unassuming but he’s full of the catty-ness.
Stella is mad because her trash bags really are trash.
Tim comes and stops the action everyone quakes in their boots. Daddy’s home. Tim’s not happy. He sees way too many tablecloths and calls the designers slackers. Uh-oh. Now they really are quaking and so am I. What is Nina going to say?
The designers are scrambling to turn their tablecloths into something else and Stella is declaring that her trashy bags will get her eliminated.
Now the models come in and there are some crazy things being put on the poor women. Crazy scary.
Time for the Runway Show.My Faves: Emily, Jerell, Korto, Jennifer, Daniel, Kenley, Kelli, Keith, Stella
My not so faves: Leanne, Terri, Suede, Joe, Jerry, Wesley, Blayne, StellaYou can see that Stella is straddling the fence for me. I could not decide on her design. I agree part if it was a yawn but I liked the simple shape of it.
The winner is… Kelli! Thanks to her fab marble dye job.
The loser is …Jerry. I have to say I agree with that one. His look was just scary. I am sorry to see Jerry go though. He would have made for interesting TV.
Whew I’m tired and now onto Shear Genius? Eek!
Remind me never to sign up for Shear Genius. There was some crazy swap stylist challenge where the stylists started with their clients and mid-process the clients had to get up and switch chairs to continue the process with another stylist. Mid-color cut or whatever. They did this multiple times only to end up back with the original stylist. One client ended up in tears. I was right there with you honey.Now it’s down the line and Charlie comes up with more fabulous one liners. “Big T#ts won’t get you out of every jam.” Ouch.The loser was Meredith.
The winner was Dee.The stylists are back home and the claws come out. Charlie starts giving crap and Dee throws it right back. Suddenly I’m loving Dee.
The elimination Challenge is giving the clients a style that they can do at home.
Dee gets first pick and then she gets to pair each stylist with the clients. Oh Charlie had better watch out. The producers know what they are doing with this scenario.
Dee picks Nekisa first and Charlie last. You know Charlie had something to say about that.Then it was time to Go Shake It! Tell them Rene! You say what?
The stylists style and then are told that the elimination will take place the next day when the clients have to come back and style their own hair.Back at the old homestead and everyone talks about Dee has a crush on the married Nekisa. DD called that on day one.
The next day the clients are back and trying to do their own hair. How much do I hate that next day hair let down?Let’s move onto the hair show. This is too painful.
The winners are: Glenn, Dee and Nicole
Losers are: Meredith, Charlie, and Nekisa. Charlie is lucky he has immunity.
The big winner is… Glenn She got her dream and will be published. I’m feeling you Glenn!
The loser is… Meredith.
Whew. This is a lot for one night. I’m spent.Best,KwanaShear Striaght
What’s Jack up to? He’s rocking out to Guitar Hero down in the basement as I’m typing this right now. Seems there’s no escaping it this summer since the DS in on some Guitar Hero quest. Sigh. Jack would like to go to sleep now and so would I.
On Shear Genus they have 1 hour to style the hair of women, some of whom have not cut it since maybe birth. And they are not allowed to cut any of it. Crazy. When judge Campbell used the word bridal on Charlie I thought he’d throw up in his mouth. Then he told Nicole she had six minutes and left could she take her style in another direction. As if?
Matthew was the winner of the challenge and he dedicated the win to his wife who he evidently styles hair with side by side. Everyone wanted to toast him, well suck up to him but Matt wanted none of it and had to be coaxed into the suckery.
Then for the elimination challenge it was red carpet hair and the stylists picked dresses before picking clients. Matthew took the opportunity to go on and on about how much he loves his wife again. We get it. You’re a male hair dresser, but you’re not gay. No need no say it again, Matthew. We’re not demanding video proof. It’s not that deep. If you say it a few more times I really won’t believe you.Matthew got to pick the order of who would choose their dresses and Nicole and Glenn were picked last. We see you didn’t suck up properly the night before
Matthew mentions his wife again and now I’m getting skeptical. And he just called Charlie a b$tch which makes me even more skeptical. I must read David Dust’s take on this.Daniel seems to have had too much coffee because he is way pumped up and nervous and making Rene nervous too. Eek.
The models have to walk out of a limo and down a red carpet in the daylight. Very unforgiving.Glenn, Charlie and Gail are the top 3. The winner was…Charlie! What tha-! Again?
The bottoms are Nicole, Matthew and Paulo. The loser is…Matthew. His final words? Something about how much he loves his wife and can’t want to get home to shag, maybe? Blah, blah, blah. Now I’m really not believing his story and I can’t stop laughing. I’d better watch out for that bolt of lightning that’s sure to strike me any moment. Poor on the DL Matt. Buh-Bye.
Best,
KwanaP.S.
The DS must have been reading my blog (see below) I’m deep into Highlander Bride at last night’s baseball game and what do I hear as he’s about to go up to bat in his Peter Brady hi-low voice but, “Mom, mom are you paying attention?” Sigh.Oh boy was I in trouble. But he had a great game. 3 base hits and they won I think 12 to 4 or something like that. It’s me ya know. I could be wrong about the score, but they did win.Shearly Perfect
What’s Jack up to? A person would never know that Jack went to obedience training with the way he tries to attack all delivery men and workers that come to my house. I do apologize to the electricians that came by and got scared out of their wits by my Yorkie yesterday. I swear he’s all bark. Well mostly.
First off I just want to say: I WANT COFFEE!!!!!! WITH MILK AND SUGAR!!!! A big ol super iced coffee from Dunkin Donuts would be nice and heavenly. Freakin herbal tea ain’t cuttin’ it. Can you tell I’m getting cranky in the cleanse? And in further proof the DH only occasionally scans my blog, and only half listens to me, he came home with an ice coffee for me from Starbucks last night. What a sweet DH enabling he is. Crack would have been easier to resist. But resist I did. UGH!!! Lord help me! Ok rant over. See me in 10 minutes for my next rant.
Yay for Sheer Genius! It’s still so much fun.
The shortcut challenge was taking clients hair from long to short and Daniel as the winner last week picked first and the order. Then before time ran out Jaclyn said scissors down and the guest judge, the witch Tabitha from last season arrived full of vim and venom. Screech!
I loved all the back talk on the walk through with Tabitha. My what a talkative crew this is! The Shortcut winner was Charlie but I thought it should have been Nicole the runner up.The elimination Challenge causes squeals of delight. It’s the Real Housewives of Orange County! Daniel turns out to be a total groupie and a bit nuts, dressing to watch Lauri’s wedding on TV. I love that amount of crazy.
The housewives are lots of fun to watch especially Vicki who seems thrilled to be back in the spotlight again. Whoo Hoo!
Kim Vo coined the phrase Blonderexic last night if I heard correctly while crunching on my sugar free energy bite. Perfect. As if he’s one to talk.
The Winner of the challenge was Charlie! It was his night.
The loser this week is…Parker. But not before Daniel has a little melt down and Charlie is a witchy. Ouch!Best,
KwanaShear Fun
What’s Jack up to? He’s back to playing big time guard dog, barking like crazy at all the big dogs that walk by. He doesn’t seem to notice that they don’t even spare little ‘ole Jack a glance.Hell week continues, but I’m smiling through it because last night was the premier of Shear Genius, the hairdressing reality show on Bravo with my all time favorite angel Jaclyn Smith. Who still looks great but I have to say it. Have she and Kim Vo both been to the same plastic surgeon for just a bit of work. Just a tiny bit. Enough to make me say stop. No more please.
So who am I loving? Oshun. Because he’s so deep or at least he thinks he is. And Charlie from, um, hell? What’s up with that? Attitude already. I love it!
The first challenge is a blindfold challenge. I could not imagine having my hair cut by a blindfolded stylist. No way! Poor Oshun came in last. Boo hoo.For the elimination Challenge that had to do hair based on cartoon characters. Too fun!
When Charlie started to compare the blue hair piece he was working on to pubic hair mentor, Rene Fris’, jaw dropped and mine did too. Ewww.I loved the Betty Boop Hair the best. This is going to be a fun show!
And don’t worry if you missed the first episode, it’s Bravo which means repeats all week.
Best,
Kwana
