This is a tough post to write. I went to my TV at 4:00 yesterday, turned to channel 7 and she wasn’t there. And by she I’m sure you all that know me, know I’m talking about Oprah. No, she wasn’t there. It was the news instead, as if I wanted to hear the news an hour early.
So I blinked and let it sink in. Oh yeah, the day before she said goodbye. She told us thanks and to move on and live our own best lives. This 4:00 hour was now time to regroup and find a way to do what was and has been in our hearts to do for so long and be the best at it that we can.
So it’s time to be myself, proud and unashamed, Becoming True Me as I start on life part 3 now as a soon to be mom of college kids. No longer any label but my name. But wow I won’t have my 4:00 anchor that has helped me grow and change so much these past 25 years as I went from a high schooler watching her on television with amazement and awe, to a college aged young woman, still drawing inspiration, into a career woman and wife and then a mother of twins and oh so thankful for the 4:00 advice and a place to draw comfort.
Well, now I have my own high schoolers moving on and moving out and my 4:00 hour is free. She’s said goodbye. The news is on. The news I can’t change.
So I’m turning off the TV and turning on the DVR to say THANK YOU to her myself one more time. Then at 5:00… watch out world here I come!
What’s Jack up to? Jack is so fickle lately. We’re having a terrible time getting him to go outside in the morning. He is so not into the cold weather. Running and hiding under the bed and making the DH late for work. Sorry bud. It is what it is and you have to get your walk.I’ve been terribly unmotivated since returning from Savannah. Running is painful. Really painful and it’s oh so cold. It’s seems to have gotten deep into my bones and they won’t loosen up enough to go the distance to get in ½ hour on the Dreadmil. I find myself barely able to handle a brisk walk. I know it will be a fight through each and every exercise session during these winter months.So I took my very sluggish behind to Weight Watchers for a weigh in and to be introduced to the new program that came out this week. 2 problems:No.1. This may not be a problem just an uncomfortable change but once again Weight Watchers has turned the WW diet world upside down and come up with a totally new plan. No more flex and core plans but now a new flex/core hybrid (much like the auto industry) called Momentum. It seems to require lots of studying and new math. Oh joy.No.2. I’ve decided to jump start my motivation by changing my day. (Ok the other day interfered with a breakfast date with friends. Shhh don’t be quiet.) This means a new group and leader. More change. And here’s the kicker. They actually sang at the end of the meeting. Seriously, took a popular song and gave it WW lyrics. Cut to my jaw dropping. Too much even for me. I may have to go back for sure now just to see what they sing next week. I guess that’s motivation enough. Pretty slick trick leader.Weight loss is such a hard thing that the words “hard thing” are too weak to describe it. It’s a tiny percent physical. Mostly mental. And then there are these strange chemical things that go on that effect everything. All of it adding up to a big old mess. I’m currently watching GMA and they are talking about Lady O and how once again she’s struggling with her weight. I know there are some that won’t have sympathy with that, but I do. Weight loss and keeping weight off is such a tough thing to do while living an easy happy life. I’m feeling for you O.Best,Kwana
- What’s Jack up to? He’s chilling today and just wishing that spring or even summer would finally come. It’s now May 21 and all of 48 degrees here this morning. Brrrrr.I’m watching Oprah, yesterday like moms the world over at 4:oo. I know so cliche, right. Sorry. So, Lady O is doing a show about that show 10 Years Younger which airs on TLC, which I love when I catch it. The show is featuring moms who have kinda let themselves go pretty much putting the needs of their family before taking care of themselves. Boy was she preaching to the choir, I thought as I looked down at yesterday’s jeans and my standard uniform tee shirt.Lately, my entire existence has been a big pre-teen and now teen filled angst time suck/mind suck, that has honestly left me stressed and haggard. Now I know I willingly signed up for it so don’t start throwing your tomatoes, I may just throw them back. But the show like all shows like them at least got me thinking for the moment to take some more time for myself and not put EVERYTHING into everyone else. I instantly called my hairdresser.Lady O talked with this author and I guess new guru, Kathy Freston about making over your life and you know me, I went straight to the Westchester Library website and ordered her book because I just love all things Oprah and a good self help book. Oh happy day. I’ll let you know how it is. But you also know I’m a flibbertigibbet so who know how that will work out. Eek.She also talk about this 21 day cleanse thing. Oh, I just love Oprah. She will try anything. Whenever the weight is creeping back on her she is telling the world and dieting with everyone just like me. What a hot mess. Say what you will. I’m with you O. Not sure about the cleanse, though. That Kathy is skinny as all get out and a Vegan to boot. Pla-ease! I’m still having trouble with Core, but we’ll see.On another note: It was back to girl power on Dancing with the Stars. It got down to Kristi and Jason as at he final 2 as it should have been. I have to say I was pulling for Jason because he is such a heartthrob but I’m fine that Kristi won it. I’m glad a girl won it. It was a fun season.
- What’s Jack up to? He’s finally on his way to the groomer for a much needed haircut. Let’s hope he’s looking a lot better when I see him again and they don’t call me early to pick up my problem dog. I have to say I’m a little nervous about this new place we’re trying. They seem a little over the top with calling the dogs “kids” and all. What up with that? Wierd-o’s or just me?Thanks so much to all of you who checked out Megan’s interview yesterday. If you missed it please check it out. Megan is awesome!Today I was going to get all philosophical and talk about A New Earth. I’m still on the New Earth wagon and liking it although I’m behind, but I’m enjoying all this study of the ego and getting over it stuff. It’s interesting. A good thought I got from the download of the chapter 2 discussion was, “what you react to in another you strengthen in yourself.” Hmm… Let’s just think about that a bit shall we?Now the total opposite of suppressing the ego was last night’s Not So Real Housewives of NYC. It was EGO to the MAX! Alex, Simon, Ramona the whole thing was a mess. Talk about desperation and dying for acceptance. It was just S-A-D. Then the mad hatter dinner party with Simon as the creepy party crasher? Crazy.And the Topper of the Night for me was LuAnn pulling rank and not wanting to be introduced to “the help” by her first name and comparing “the help” to children. UGH. Just when I didn’t think it could get any worse. It did. Eek. Next week is the season Finale. Awww…. so soon?
- What’s Jack up to? Well he still needs a haircut but he’s no longer a stinky dog. Thank goodness. Check out the video at the end to see how nutty Jack is when wet. He just hates it, but does he have to dry off on my couch?Thanks to all of you who visited yesterday!The whole Love and Consequences memoir hoax discussion was really great and very important. Feel free to continue to share you thoughts.The more I thought about the whole subject, the angrier I got. And what really got to me was the underlying exploitism of the races that I saw there. The fact that Jones thought somehow that her lie was justified because she was giving a voice to people who didn’t have one. Ugh. Talk about a big ego. As if she was somehow more qualified to write the story than say a real girl who grew up in that time and that environment. Pluh-ease.
Speaking of ego. I watched the Oprah webcast of A New Earth and about five minutes into it I was pleasantly surprised at how many points spoke to me.They talked about ideas like getting out of your head and stillness and stopping the mental noise which is something that I’ve been striving for especially with the stress in my life and my migraines. They also addressed those who were struggling with the tough 1st chapter of the book. See we are not alone! It does get easier. Another thing addressed was all the questions people had about dealing with this book along with their religion which was a real issue for me as a Christan. More to come.I won’t recommend this as something you must read or listen to and follow because that’s not for me to do and I’m still working on myself and how to incorporate these thoughts into my life and my beliefs, but I would recommend going to Oprah’s site and watching some of the webcast. It’s up there now for anyone to watch. That way you can judge for yourself. If you’re reading the book it made it a lot easier to understand. I was so not feeling on the same planet as Tolle when I was just reading. Now I think I may be. I do like they he said he didn’t want to be any ones Guru. I always question those that want to lead and have power. go judge for yourself and feel free to come back here and chat.Oh, Did any one see Paris Hilton hanging out with a shaman and giving away diamond necklaces? What up with dat? Discuss amongst yourselves. I just can’t…
photo thanks to The Bosh. eek.Best,KwanaP.S.Project Runway finale tonight!!!!!!! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!! We’ll chat tomorrow.
What’s Jack up to? He’s having a grand time making the DH walk around the block numerous times for nothing. Oh, the joys of having a dog.
So I tried to watch the Oprah and Eckhart Tolle webcast class for A NEW EARTH, really, I did. What a time I had. My laptop kept freezing so I went downstairs to my desktop and was never able to get a picture there. All I ended up getting were broken sound bytes. I’ll try today to see if I can watch the replay on Oprah.com. Did anyone get to watch?
I did get to watch The Royals special on abc last night. I thought it was pretty good. I love all that inner workings stuff. A really liked the coverage of Queen Elizabeth. It was great to see her feisty nature at her age. The woman is a powerful force.
So it’s happened again. Another book is being pulled from the shelves because of charges that the supposed memoir is false. I’ve got some Deja Frey going on here.
The New York Times said, “In “Love and Consequences,” a critically acclaimed memoir published last week, Margaret B. Jones wrote about her life as a half-white, half-Native American girl growing up in South-Central Los Angeles as a foster child among gang-bangers, running drugs for the Bloods. “
FYI. Margaret B Jones’ real name is Margaret Seltzer. Seltzer now admits that it was all made up. What? How uncool is that? And I have to admit I’m a little mad that she choose to exploit what is largely a minority problem in this country. No, I wouldn’t be as mad if she just called the book what it was, fiction. But mad I am.
Ms. Seltzer said, “For whatever reason, I was really torn and I thought it was my opportunity to put a voice to people who people don’t listen to,” Ms. Seltzer said. “I was in a position where at one point people said you should speak for us because nobody else is going to let us in to talk. Maybe it’s an ego thing — I don’t know. I just felt that there was good that I could do and there was no other way that someone would listen to it.” Really? I’m not buying it.
What a shame that in order to get a book deal authors feel they have to make-up life stories. Part of me feels like it’s just awful that someone would lie like that and I wonder how come they couldn’t write the same book, call it fiction and have it published. Well, I think the answer to that is that it would probably never be published. Everything nowadays needs a ‘hook’ and often times it’s not just about the story, but about the personality behind the story. People (I guess myself included) want to gawk into other’s lives.
Was this always the way? There is plenty of great fiction that reads like memoirs and have stood up over the years. Books like: Alice Walker’s The Color Purple and one of my favorites Terry McMillan’s Mama are examples.
What are your thoughts?
Quotes thanks to NYT Photos thanks to MSN search
- What’s Jack up to? Today I’ll be calling him Stinky because he’s in desperate need of a bath. Jack, I’ll be washing you and Febreze-ing everything in sight so there no escaping, dude.This was a weekend full of highs and lows. The low being my migraine getting so bad that I ended up in the ER. There must some budding scientist out there that can cure this thing once and for all. Where are you? After years of this mess I am so over it.The highs of the weekend, singing Happy Birthday to Nana and going to my local RWA/NYC chapter meeting and hearing my most excellent PIC, Megan give a talk about Plotting By The Seat Of Your Pants. Megan, whose Regency, A Singular Lady, is out with Signet, will be giving this talk at the New England conference in April so if you’re attending definitely go see her. You won’t be disappointed. I’ve already tapped Megan for an interview on the subject here which will be coming soon. She had lots of great things to say and one thing that really jumped out at me was when she said, you really have to analyze if you are true pantser and not just a plotter looking to get out of the work. Ah-ha. Something to think about.On another note I’m really looking forward to watching Barbara Walters’ special on The Royals tonight. I just love all things British. Don’t ask me why. I guess beneath this tough exterior I’m a girl who longed to be a princess.That said, this all may be interrupted by Oprah’s online class on Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth. You know I love all things Oprah (my motto:all roads lead to Oprah) so of course I picked up Tolle’s book. Sadly I’m only up to page 75. It’s one of the hardest books I’ve ever read. Is my brain not on the same plain as his. I read a sentence and am like, huh? Oh well. From what I can understand, Tolle gives really good points on ego and it does have me thinking. That brings me back to my subject line. I really can’t stand it when people state their opinions like they are actual facts. Maybe because of Tolle’s book that I noticed it jumping out at me all weekend and it really bugged me. It seemed that everyone had something that they thought was really “important” to say. Ugh. Sometimes I feel like no one is listening, but just waiting for the moment that they can jump in and give their opinions. Which goes back to the old saying, Opinions are like butt-holes (clean blog here), everybody has one.Now, I know that having this blog is the ultimate in ego, but I hope I’m going about it the correct way and never forget that the things written here are just my opinions, not facts. Hmm…Oprah may be on the right track with all this new earth stuff.Best,Kwana